(Backdate: 5/13/14 9:40 PM)
While I was reading an article on the Enliven blog this evening regarding discernment, prophesy, and personal prophesy (asking God what to show you in your own life, how He sees you,) I remembered a time a few years ago when my dog passed away. At the time I was recently going through a divorce, had moved back home with my parents and brought my two dogs (Xena and Nixon) with me. It was an incredibly stressful time and I had also just been going through a long bout of depression (with what I realize now was demonic oppression) when I started seeking God for help. I asked Him if there was a way for helping me with all of these stresses and handling two fairly hyperactive dogs (one almost 2-years-old, the other about 9 to 11-months-old), and I believe at one point I asked Him if there was a way we could figure something out with the dogs since I didn’t think I would be able to handle both of them mostly on my own (my parents were around but it was still stressful trying to deal with both of their energies on my own most of the time.)
It was the night before Thanksgiving, my favorite holiday, when I had a dream that I was standing next to the armoire that is next to the door leading into the bathroom from my bedroom. The dogs were being fairly hyper, as usual, and God told me that He was going to take Xena up to heaven to be with Him and that I needed to focus my attention on Nixon. I didn’t argue or plead in the dream, although I will admit now that at the time I was hoping if we found a solution for one of the dogs that I would keep Xena, but I took this information as matter of fact. His voice wasn’t angry, commanding, or vindictive, but calming like that of a parent stepping in to help a child who had bitten off more than they could handle by themselves.
The next morning when I awoke Xena had passed away in her sleep on the bathroom floor, which was her spot to lay as it was cooler than being in her bed. I still remember the sight of her as she looked as though she was still asleep and my heart was broken.
A few weeks went by and as I was still rather upset that she was actually gone. I prayed to God that He would take my pain away. I remember going into my backyard and looking up at the stars as I prayed and I received an image of God up in Heaven with my little Xena sitting near Him and He reassured me that she was up there with Him, waiting for the day that I could join them. I felt a large amount of relief in this and tears of joy rushed down my face. I am so thankful that we have such a caring, merciful, and loving Father who has our best interest in mind.
To this day I need to remember and remind myself that I still need to focus on Nixon, even though it has been several years now since I have had that dream telling me to do so. I know this doesn’t mean I need to be with him every moment of my day, but I need to remember that God has left him here with me for a reason.
I am, to this day, thankful for the vision of Xena up in Heaven with Him. I wish that He would show me more of His will the same way as that day and I will never forget it and never forget the presence I felt into Him on that day, which I pray for on a daily basis.