Where is your Faith?

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. For by it the elders obtained a good report.

Through faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the word of God, so that things which are seen were not made of things which do appear. By faith Abel offered unto God a more excellent sacrifice than Cain, by which he obtained witness that he was righteous, God testifying of his gifts: and by it he being dead yet speaketh. By faith Enoch was translated that he should not see death; and was not found, because God had translated him: for before his translation he had this testimony, that he pleased God. But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him. By faith Noah, being warned of God of things not seen as yet, moved with fear, prepared an ark to the saving of his house; by the which he condemned the world, and became heir of the righteousness which is by faith. By faith Abraham, when he was called to go out into a place which he should after receive for an inheritance, obeyed; and he went out, not knowing whither he went. By faith he sojourned in the land of promise, as in a strange country, dwelling in tabernacles with Isaac and Jacob, the heirs with him of the same promise: For he looked for a city which hath foundations, whose builder and maker is God.

Through faith also Sara herself received strength to conceive seed, and was delivered of a child when she was past age, because she judged him faithful who had promised. Therefore sprang there even of one, and him as good as dead, so many as the stars of the sky in multitude, and as the sand which is by the sea shore innumerable. These all died in faith, not having received the promises, but having seen them afar off, and were persuaded of them, and embraced them, and confessed that they were strangers and pilgrims on the earth.

For they that say such things declare plainly that they seek a country. And truly, if they had been mindful of that country from whence they came out, they might have had opportunity to have returned. But now they desire a better country, that is, an heavenly: wherefore God is not ashamed to be called their God: for he hath prepared for them a city.
(Hebrews 11:1-16 KJV)


For God hath not appointed us to wrath, but to obtain salvation by our Lord Jesus Christ, Who died for us, that, whether we wake or sleep, we should live together with him. Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do. And we beseech you, brethren, to know them which labour among you, and are over you in the Lord, and admonish you; And to esteem them very highly in love for their work’s sake. And be at peace among yourselves. Now we exhort you, brethren, warn them that are unruly, comfort the feebleminded, support the weak, be patient toward all men. See that none render evil for evil unto any man; but ever follow that which is good, both among yourselves, and to all men. Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. Quench not the Spirit. Despise not prophesyings. Prove all things; hold fast that which is good. Abstain from all appearance of evil. And the very God of peace sanctify you wholly; and I pray God your whole spirit and soul and body be preserved blameless unto the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. Faithful is he that calleth you, who also will do it. (1 Thessalonians 5:9-24)

Driving Around to Think

I’ve been upset this evening over quite a few things. One of which was something revealed to my boyfriend about what it is I’m supposed to be doing. Though I am incredibly grateful that I understand more clearly my situation and what I need to be working on, I am still frustrated that it wasn’t revealed to me throughout my prayers and requests. But I also know that maybe I wasn’t fully able to listen.
Often I go through times where I feel that my prayers are heard but there is something hindering me from being able to hear clearly or at all any responses to what I might be praying about. Most of the responses I might get are so slight that I can’t tell if they’re a form of my subconscious answering what I think the Lord would say on one matter or another. I try to clear my mind and be open to whatever answer I may get, trying not to allow my thoughts to sway one way or another, but in the end I’m still not certain. I understand that there are times when we wont have clear answers, don’t get me wrong, but lately it’s been a lot more foggy than usual. When I do feel compelled one way more than the other I typically go ahead with what I felt compelled for, asking all the while that if I’m incorrect in doing so that I will be corrected so I can resolve it.
I am a fixer. I like to fix things and resolve issues as soon as they come up. This can be incredibly frustrating when dealing with situations of patience, especially in regards to my own life. I am typically a patient person with others and will pray that they will come around to whatever it is the Lord might be speaking about, but lately I’ve been worried about this foggy communication.
I was driving around tonight with my dog, just to get out of the house, and decided to turn down a street of the new part of the neighborhood they are building. When we originally moved here it was an area owned by farmers and within the last year or two they have sold a portion of their land for others to build up a newer residential area within our neighborhood. Of course, I didn’t like this idea at first because they also tore out a lot of trees that covered one side of the street, and most of the houses they are putting in are miniature mansion in style (though they’re not that big).
It occurred to me tonight as I was driving around in this that it felt darker than usual. I got a sense that the air was thick and hard to breathe. I had already wondered, before taking the left turn into this new section of the neighborhood, if there might be new spiritual beings (demonic) that might also be moving in. If you think about it in the context of them working against and harassing those who are un-believers (not to say that us as Christians aren’t ever harassed or bothered) it kind of makes sense.
If felt dark and a bit unnerving to be driving through there. I can’t say that most of this was due to some of the houses still being in skeleton form, since I’ve been around houses and buildings being built or under construction before, and this didn’t feel the same. I also considered the fact that it’s dark out and things can easily seem creepier in the dark. It wasn’t that.
After leaving this area and making another left turn out to one of the main roads towards my street, the air didn’t feel quite as heavy.. until I got home. Continue reading

When Weeks Feel Like Months

I have had quite the week this week and would like to write more on some other topics concerning our Christian faith and some areas I believe people tend to get stuck on. As for right now I do not have the mental copacity to do so and it will have to wait.

It has been a very interesting week though. What I thought was a “wilderness” season in regards to discernment of spirits was.. not. Maybe I’ll get into the experiences we had at a later time. I will say they were probably the most interesting I have had in regards to having someone along side me, witnessing and confirming the things I was witnessing myself in regards to the spiritual realm.

Seeing things can, for the most part, be a scary thing that can cause you to be overcome with fear. One of the many verses I have found encouraging when encountering things from the spiritual realm is Exodus 19:5, where God clearly says, “ for all the earth is mine

Another that comes to mind is Exodus 14:14 stating that the Lord will fight for us.
Seek Him and He shall protect you. He shall give unto His children of their needs, for He hears our cries.

Until a another time. While you’re here, enjoy this picture of some bears and feel free to make up your own commentary of what they’re saying in your head.


Outcome of Silence

In regards to my previous post, In Moments of Silence, I felt the need to explain a part of my realizations.
First off, God has been speaking to Brandon and I about our coming future, whatever it may be, and with me being the type of person that tries to plan everything (a bit of a control freak) I became consumed with trying to plan what was not even fully revealed.
Through daydreaming of what could come about (though I don’t yet know) I began to feel as though I’m not doing enough or I’m not on the right track of what will come about. All of these feelings were my own, though I could say that I’m not sure if there was emphasis from the enemy in regards to this, but for the most part it was my own doing. I felt I was constantly concerned and troubled that I wasn’t able to hear what the Lord was telling me to do or what I needed to be working on to help go towards the future He has planned for us. I was letting my fears and doubts consume me all the while constantly asking for direction and guidance.
Last night as I was in bed I was praying and asking if I need to go to school, focus on studying the Bible, continue writing my thoughts or things that happened online, quitting my job, searching for a new job, etc etc. While I was going through this list of things I wasn’t sure I should or shouldn’t be focused on I got a very clear answer from Him telling me to STOP. To just stop talking, stop fretting and worried, and basically just to shut up. After that all of these thoughts ceased and I just sat in silence.
I praise the Lord for such clarity and for being so gentle in the way that He deals with my undoings. God has been telling me that as far as my future goes, the time is not yet here for me to be so active in what He will want me to do. Right now, I need to keep doing what I’m already doing and trust that He will tell me when it is time. And in that time He will let me know what it is I need to do.

This whole time I’ve been praying for clarity and felt all I was getting was silence, when really it was me that needed to be silent. It’s a good thing to remember to trust that the Lord will tell you when it’s time to do whatever it is He has planned for you. It’s not for us to go through our lives worrying about being on the right path and worrying we’ll miss the mark. He loves us and wants us to remember to count on Him and He has our best interests in mind even through the hard times.

Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD.
Psalms 27:14

Continue reading

Witness Lee Clarification

I think it should be clarified on the thoughts and conclusions I have come to concerning Living Stream Ministry and the teachings of Witness Lee. Awhile back I made a post about some of the research I did on the matter as I was attending one of the churches brought up by LSM. The Lord allowed me to see the truth behind what was being taught and I quickly realized I needed to get out of there.

What I wanted to clarify goes more along the lines with the spiritual gifts. Now, Paul wrote to the Corinthians concerning the spiritual gifts and he pretty much laid it all out there. If you’re going to use them, which you should, use them in the right manner. God chooses who He gives each gift to and some gifts work differently for each person. For Example: if I have the gift of discernment and feel a strange spiritual presence in one area while another person, with the same gift, is able to see or hear a spirit, then it can very well be confirmed there’s something going on. There are different variations with how the gifts work for each person and each person is given their own gift. (There’s a lot of debate about people having multiple gifts or only receiving one. I can’t really testify to that myself as I only know of the one for me right now and I’m not willing to assume any others for myself without a revealing from God.)

Think of it as a puzzle that when all the pieces come together they will reveal what God has to tell us about something. If I have one piece, you have another, and three more people each have one piece, then we need to put them together to see the full picture. We need to work together. This is what Paul was trying to stress to the Corinthians, that the gifts are to be used to edify the church and bring more people to know Christ.

Does that mean that God wont speak to you strongly while you’re spending time with Him alone? No. But if He gives you a prophesy it should be shared with those you trust in order for you all to figure out the true meaning of it. One thing people tend to lose sight of is that God speaks in different ways and while you might get one interpretation, the many other interpretations might actually come together to mean something else. That there might be different meaning to what God was telling you than you first realized.

This is what I felt that Witness Lee did. I feel that he had one piece of the puzzle and with not testing it he took it as a sign that he was a new prophet for God. That HE had the correct way for all of us and we need to obey HIM. It’s kind of sad to see how someone can study so much of the Bible and miss so many important points. I believe that after all this was happening and Witness Lee was writing of the things he felt were true revelations from God, he started allowing that to build his own ego, not staying humble (as we are also told to do as servants to the Lord). I’ve even heard he went as far as calling himself the “Oracle.”

I guess the important thing to remember when you go to speak to others about what you feel God is telling you is to ask who it’s going to glorify. Remember share these things humbly and test everything before you have a full conclusion.

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. Do not quench the Spirit. Do not despise prophecies. Test all things; hold fast what is good. Abstain from every form of evil.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-22

Desiring to Help

One thing that has to be remembered about the gift of discernment is that you won’t always feel like it’s “turned on.” There are times when you won’t notice or feel anything at all which is when you have to be especially careful. Your shouldn’t let all of your focus be on what’s going on around you, almost as if you’re paranoid, but should be open to God’s revealing and not lose sight or trust in Him.
I often go back and forth in my head about the gift of discernment, wondering if I really was given that through the Holy Spirit or if I was just experiencing some much more evident warfare going on. In the past I have had it confirmed while praying about it but still ask “why me?” I feel there are much more deserving people out there that wouldn’t seem to fall so quickly or allow such fears to hinder them, but maybe that’s a part of the reason for it all. Maybe it’s God’s way of speaking to my heart so that I will continually grow in Him and seek His will for my life.

I can’t even express to you the amount of desire I have to help others going through demonic bondage. I feel there’s a part of me that has always had that desire, even before I knew anything about spiritual gifts. I would love to be able to go to others to help them, through prayer, realize what it is that is “haunting” them or causing them such grief. To help them into coming to the Lord and realizing just how Awesome He really is.
I would love to realize when the enemy is at work and help others understand the nature that they do their works in this world; for God to reveal what it is we’re up against and how important it is that we continually work on our relationship with Him, growing, learning to love others in such a worldly place, and seeking His guidance in everything.

I’ve met some people around me that seem to have a lot more going on than they’re likely to admit. I’ve met some that seem completely untrustworthy and feel I need to stay away from them, only to realize there is more going on in their lives than anyone might realize. That they are most likely being deceived in what they’re thinking or feeling is going on but don’t realize how dangerous some things can be. I’ve met those who are so blinded by the ways of this world they’re not even open to hear any aspects of God working in someone’s life. I’ve met some who have such hardened hearts that I don’t know if they’ll ever come around to what God has given us. It breaks my heart to witness these things and if there’s any way that God can use me to help those around me, I am completely willing to do so.

While reading about the fear of the LSM group taking over churches in India and deceiving those around them, someone wrote “It is something that concerns our spiritual life and we should not take it lightly.” That quote has stuck with me on and off since I’ve read it and it’s all too true. You don’t fully even know how easily your spiritual life can be effected by the things around you. How one little entrance of something ungodly or worldly can cause you to start to slip and not see what it is you’re supposed to be doing. That’s one of the import reasons we need to read our Bibles everyday and talk to the Lord every day, being open to His guidance.

I will admit that over the last week or so I felt as though I shouldn’t be writing anymore. That I was letting it distract me from what God wanted me to be working on and that I needed to figure out what I’m supposed to be doing. What if I AM doing what I’m supposed to be doing? This morning I had a strong sense of urgency to write, to communicate my thoughts on what has been going on with me, and now I realize that the enemy has once again been working on making me feel lost. Making me feel as though there’s all this important stuff I’m supposed to be working on but it’s all my fault that I don’t feel God is telling me what it is. The truth is that I might be doing just what I’m supposed to be doing. I need to remember that I need to keep up what I do and wait on the word of the Lord to tell me otherwise. I will no longer feel guilty for taking the time to write, especially since that is usually the way that I come to a lot of realizations about what God might be trying to tell me in the first place.

I’m sorry if what I write comes off as a little confusing at times, and honestly I don’t expect anyone to read it. I’ve told Brandon before that most of what I write might seem very personal for me and I’m not usually one to tell everyone every little thing I’m struggling with, but I feel there is an importance to let others know they’re not alone. There are others out there that go through difficult or strange things. And whether anyone reads it or not, at least I got to come to God given conclusions about matters at hand.

Tom Deckard – the (false) Jewish Prophet

(Backdate: 6/17/14 10:38 PM)

Yesterday I came across a video online of a “Jewish [self proclaimed] Prophet” that seemed very passionate about what he claims God is telling him. At first some of the things he was saying seemed to make sense, as most false prophets will do, and upon further investigation I learned a lot of truths about this man are incredibly false.

 His name is Tom Deckard.

He has his own website, which is slightly painful to even look at, where he goes on about his prophesies that have already come true, how credible he is (not sure by whom), and even has a gif image of a smokey mist floating around his head in pictures claiming that it’s “the Holy Ghost” working with him. His website states,

“These pictures have been examined by experts proving their authenticity [no experts cited]. When the cloud appears, all manner of healings, miracles, salvation and deliverance comes to those who come in contact with the cloud. The cloud has demonstrated the glory of G-d to such an extent that many of other religions fall on their faces and receive Jesus as their L-rd and Savior.”

Honestly, it’s a pretty puny looking cloud. I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty sure that if such things were happening in the statement above, it wouldn’t have been a situation of chance that they got a picture of what looks like someone smoking a cigar.

Needless to say I saw no evidence of testimonies from anyone other than himself that what he was saying was the truth. No scriptural back up. No testimonies. Just falsehood and bologna.

He is a self proclaimed prophet claiming to have prophesied over such things as the current going-ons with the US and Russia to the swine flu epidemic. There have been no posts or witnesses to his “prophesies” and I haven’t seen any testimonies (other than his over inflated opinion of himself) that further prove what he has said.

Do people really not understand how easy it is to back date anything written on a computer? Or anything written in general for that matter. Do they not understand how easy it is to manipulate documents or writings?

I don’t claim to be an expert in the field of falsehood, but even I can edit most anything on my computer if I really want to.

Back to the false prophet, I entered his name in a Google search and instantly found several websites up that speak against him. Here are just some of the ones I found:

A False Prophet – Tom Deckard

DECKARD’S DEMONICS – A Profile Of “Prophet” Tom Deckard

Who Is Tom Deckard?

Beware of the False Prophet Tom Deckard

The Truth About Tom Deckard

Now, I must admit, I am very impressed with the way the freedomfromthelaw.com (The Truth About Tom Deckard) created a page titled Tom says – God says to put some of the things he has claimed in his writings, website, and even audio CDs, putting them side by side with scripture (when what was spewing out of his mouth was even able to be compared to what Scripture says). I found most of what they quoted him saying, which I’ve heard some of it for myself, almost amusing. For example:


In his CD Series “Man & His Family” Mr. Deckard states, “If your wife will not submit to you… get rid of her!  There are plenty out there who will.”


Matthew 19:16  “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”


A False Prophet – Tom Deckard – has some interesting news articles on the matter of him claiming to be an Orthodox Jew, having prophesied for over 40 years in this ministry. Honestly, it’s the first I’ve ever heard of him and as far as the articles have said, he was a pastor at a church until it was learned that he had been sleeping around with several wives in the congregation (which one then left her husband to marry him. I guess they’re still together).

Although I find it heartbreaking that others out there are naive enough to believe such a man, we were warned about this. The most I can do is pray for those out there getting sucked into such things and hope that they listen to God and open their eyes.

I’ll end this post here. I’m running out of fuel and I don’t feel that this needs to waste any more of my time.

Just be careful who you listen to and remember to question and test everything.


Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles? Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit. A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire. Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.

Matthew 7:15-20

The enemy near or God’s revealing?

(Backdate: 6/6/14 12:27 PM)

Could it be that God was allowing such revelations of oppression and the enemy being near to help shield and distract me from what others believe? To show me the true discernment even in “the church?” The discernment I have felt in the church was not that of the enemy drawing near to me while I was with believers, but was the discernment through the Holy Spirit on what was being taught in underlying notes and proclaimed principles. That even though some may appear to be speaking the truth, the messages and attitudes hidden within their truths might not be fully accurate and in accordance with the scriptures. I am not claiming I do not believe they are believers in Christ. Upon my own investigation, I believe they are somewhat stuck on the one and only viewpoint of a few believers, instead of the overall viewpoint God has given us through all ministries. It is a confusing thing to feel discernment when you are in a church and among believers, which is why I have prayed over and over for God to reveal to me the meaning of such discernment as I didn’t fully understand it at the time. Over time, and seeking to be open to Him, not focusing on the strange feelings but continuing my walk with Him on a daily level, He has revealed the reason for such discernment. Some might try to claim that based on my previous actions while I was in church, when God was giving me a realization about something personal in my life, that I am just being hesitant or the enemy is trying to draw me away. But I will tell you right now, that through my own studies of the Bible, prayer, and asking God to clarify the things I was concerned about, I feel even more strongly that if that is not the route for me to take I need to seek the ministries and path God has set for me so I might grow in Him and be a witness, being fruitful and bringing others the good news about Christ. In saying that I no longer agree with all the “truths” on these viewpoints, and no longer feel that my place is in this church, as God had directed me to seek something else, I will continue to seek what ministries in which He is calling me. Just because I might go from one church to another does not mean I am “off the path” or “lost.” It means I am seeking where God needs me to be and where I am to serve Him. We, as Christians, are all in the global body of Christ. If that is the case, how can leaving one church for another, when your are truly seeking God, mean you are lost or out of touch with the truth? God is my truth and the Bible is His word. No matter where it takes me, if I am truly seeking Him, Christ will prevail and the glory will be to Him.

I would ask of those fellow believers who are in such a ministry to not look at me as lost, but to rejoice with me that we have such an amazing Lord that will speak to us all on such a personal level. I would ask that they not alter their view of me based solely on the fact that I no longer have an interest to follow the only teachings of Witness Lee and the Living Stream Ministries, but that I want to start hungry for God, the life He has planned for me, whatever it may be, and to learn as much as I can about what believers are doing to further His purpose.

For those of you still in the LSM, I would ask you if you are also seeking the Lord on a personal level and that you learn to take any ministries with a grain of salt, being open to what the Lord tells you about them. We all have a lot to learn from each other and should not let our judgments become clouded by only one set viewpoint.

Question and test everything another believer tells you of their interpretations and do not let the influences of others hinder you from the relationship to the body in Christ, that is made of all genuine believers everywhere. Let the Holy Spirit in you speak without your own preconceived notions of this group or that, this ministry or another, or “these people” or “those.”

Explore God’s word and His church (that is to say, all the churches that are genuinely seeking Him), not just the churches that are made by men.